Here we go...

I've been meaning to start a blog for a while now. Given the world we live in today, it only seems natural... right?

I have been living and working in New York City since I graduated from college in 2007. After landing what I thought to be the perfect "first" job and then it turning into a disaster, I decided to write a blog. One post, and that was it.

You could say that this is my second attempt to start a blog, and hopefully this time I succeed. I'm desperately looking for an outlet to vent and commiserate with others.

That "perfect" first job I mentioned above - in hindsight, not so bad. I had the classic evil boss, who publicly berated me and was as tough as nails. However, looking back, I couldn't have asked for a better first boss (though, I could have done without her attitude). She taught me an invaluable amount, looked out for me (the phrase, "Can I buy you lunch?" was uttered often), and truthfully wanted me to succeed. I wish I knew then what I know now.

Through a series of events, I got laid off, though I quickly found another job at a competing company in the same industry. I knew, even before I took this job, that I didn't want it - I wanted to switch industries and try something different. But when you are unemployed in an economy like this, who are you to turn something down?

And that's how I've ended up here.

I'm completely and utterly miserable in this job. Forgetting the fact that I no longer want to work in this industry, the job is just plain boring. I'm still not exactly sure why they hired me - surely they knew that there wasn't much to be done in this position. I spend most of my 8:30-5:30 days playing solitaire, looking for jobs, surfing the net, reading up on my gossip, and talking to friends on Gchat. And while this may seem like the ideal situation - getting paid to do nothing - it's far from true.

I was EXTREMELY busy, almost too busy, at my previous job. However, this kept me motivated, it kept me wanting to come to work, and it kept me on my toes. Yes, my hours were 8 to 7 most days, but I had a purpose in life. Now, not so much.

I'm left every day feeling worthless and empty, and with a desperation to find what I'm "meant to do with my life." Because I have so much free time on my hands at work, I spend hours upon hours just thinking (never a good thing) and pondering the meaning of life and my purpose in it.

I'm pretty sure I'm going through a quarterlife crisis (aka a QLC).